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I just couldnīt do it!

(3)
Poeky Wellington Jan 31, 2003 05:35 Read 126 times, Dig?
My futue doesnīt worrie me a whole lot right now and the fact the it doesnīt does worry me. Right now i kinda have the feeling that i will go to university "somewhere" where i will most likely study "something" and possibly i will meet "someone" who will want to shear his live with me and iīll aks myself "why?" not because i donīt want to but because right now i canīt imagin someone falling in love with me. right now the idea of having a planed out future is so unappeiling to me. with planned out i mean that i will go to uni and study something dry and straight forward like PR or marketing and then iīll have to look for a job (by this time it will 2007 at which time iīll be 24) and then when itīs to late, iīll realize that iīm stuck.īIīll have the resposibility... not to a corrperation alone but to people and friends, to follow the expected paths which at one point in yer live means that you stay in one place and the way i see it now, i canīt do that. Iīd get restless, my heart will start to swell and expand, i will feel it fibrating in my chest like i have before and iīll act really frustrated and unhumbled and then my heart and me along with it will explode and take me and the people around me out. traveling humbels me, i realize that i donīt know anything, about people, love, life, learning, social habbits, the way people interact with eachother and why etc etc etc. when i travel i can still and listen and lean, when my heart is fidrating itīs so loude that i need some other noise to blok it out and that other noise is generally my own voice generating verbal, sloppy shit. to be continued....   
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Comments from other users:

  • "it sounds so much like my thought process that it's kinda scary. i hope that this is the youth that people speak of and that one day, after years of it, i will be content sitting on a porch and watching ." - ephidryn
  • "don't change a thing, Poeky... i give you mad props for knowing what you want/don't want and for doing what makes you happy :o)" - ddgrrl
  • "It is not what you do, it is how you do it. Wash dishes or fly a plane, do it with presence and good intent. That is all there is." - zoe
  • "to those nitpicking at the grammar. this person is from holland. if you spent more time reading and less time crutching your ego, you'd have known that. do the world a favor. don't EVER leave the U.S." - religious icon
  • "maybe it is the grammar, but the layout. try the key once in a while." - vdrake
  • "I suggest you study English at the university. Your horrible grammar and spelling make this story hard to follow." - squid
  • "You are what you create. You create by the declaration of words. Words. So change your language, you can change your reality, and your future. Your future is your responsibility. Be accountable." - The Flaming Cow
  • "i AM 24. i DID study marketing. i haven't met anyone to share my life with. i think it's late, i'm stuck. i don't think i traveled enough and now it's time to become responsible. and i think i'm scared." - likkle
This story was written by Poeky Wellington and has been brought you you by the letters C and C.
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